Intimate Images

How to talk to your teens about sharing and receiving nudes

While it’s important to openly discuss the risks of sending sexual images (nudes) with your teen, it’s also critical to address both the sharing and receiving of sexts.

• Starting the Conversation

  Even though this is the first generation of youth who can instantaneously communicate worldwide and use devices to share pictures online, parents still need to prepare children with skills and knowledge to help navigate this online world. Here are some tips to get the conversation started:

  • Come with an attitude of curiosity and interest to understand the social pressures your teen is facing and listen to what they think this generation of teens have to consider online.
  • Avoid becoming emotionally charged to try to keep the conversation open. Think about how you discussed bike safety when they were younger — matter of fact and calm.
  • Conversations need to be ongoing. Remember, you probably needed to remind them more than once to wear their bike helmet.
  • Remind your teen that you are in their corner both to cheer them on and to help them when times are tough.
  • Reassure your teen that if they ever feel in over their head, aren’t sure what to do with a situation they are facing, or have friends who may need some help, they can ALWAYS come to you. This isn’t to say there aren’t consequences for actions, but it is important to remind your teen that you will always stand by them and will get through anything together.

• Sending Nudes

  Facts for Youth:

  • If you take a nude and send it to someone, even if you trust that person, there is huge risk the picture could be shared with others without you knowing.
  • Once it has been shared beyond where you intended, it can be stored on others’ devices, and where it goes from there is out of your control.
  • The fallout from sharing nudes can be really harmful emotionally, socially, and psychologically.

  Tips for Youth:

  • Be really careful about what pictures you choose to share of yourself.
  • Make nudes off limits — draw the line — no nudes
  • If someone asks or is pressuring you to send nudes, even after you didn’t respond or said no — then they are trying to control you. This is not okay.
  • If someone is pressuring you to send nudes, they are probably pressuring someone else, too. Talk to an adult who can help.
  • If you or someone you know makes a mistake, you can go to adults for help. Determine who those adults are in your life.
  • You can go to needhelpnow.ca for information and for help with gaining back control of an image or video.

• Receiving Nudes and What to do With Them

  Facts for Youth:

  • If you receive a nude on your phone and keep it then you are storing it on your device. Storing nudes of someone under 18 years old can have serious legal consequences.
  • Sharing nudes of someone else under 18 years old may be considered illegal. For general information about Canadian laws that intersect with this visit needhelpnow.ca.
  • If your device belongs to your parents (the contract is under their name), then the nudes are being stored on or sent from their device. This could have implications for your parents.
  • Sharing nudes of someone else can have harmful emotional, social, and psychological impacts on the youth who is in the picture, as well as on others. Sharing causes harm.

  Tips for Youth:

  • Don’t ask for nudes. Understand that pressuring someone else for nudes is coercion. This is controlling behaviour.
  • Nudes sent under pressure are not considered to be consensual. This is harmful and may be illegal.
  • If you receive a nude, delete it. Do not share someone’s nudes.
  • If you know someone’s nudes are being shared, or you make a mistake and share someone’s nudes, talk to an adult who can help.

If your teen has lost control over an intimate image/video contact Cybertip.ca.

Your nude is online. Now what?

If you are under 18 and someone is sharing a nude (intimate image ) of you, there ARE steps you can take.

We can help.

• I need help.

  • I want to report to Cybertip.ca.

    Go to the Cybertip.ca report form and click the bottom left box to begin.

  • I want to talk to someone on the phone.

    Cybertip.ca can help provide you with more information about how to regain control of a picture and/or the resources that may be available to help. Call us toll-free at 1-866-658-9022.

  • I want to get the picture off the internet.

    If the picture is online, you can also take action to have it removed yourself. We created needhelpnow.ca to walk you through steps that can be taken to get pictures off the internet.

• Someone has my nude. What can I do?

  • If you do not know if your picture is online or being shared and you are worried that it might happen, or if you know it is being shared and you want it to stop, you might want to send a message to the person who has your picture/video saying something like:

    “I do not consent to you having the picture/video of me [add description, such as, ‘that I sent you on (DATE)’], I want you to delete it and I do not give you permission to share it with anyone.”

    Sending a message like this is important because once the person knows how you feel they can no longer say they didn’t know your views. You can send a text or email, tell the person by phone or in person, or have someone else communicate the message. The best way to send a message, however, is in writing so you will have a copy of what was sent.

  • If you are scared that a nude of you will be shared by someone, you can apply for something called a prevention order (i.e., an order from a court that names a specific person and tells them not to share or post an existing intimate image). Involving a safe adult to help you would probably be a good idea if you want to go down this path.
  • You can also report your concern to us through our Cybertip.ca report form or to local police. If you decide to enter a report at Cybertip.ca, once it has been processed, all information connected to it may be forwarded to law enforcement and/or child welfare for review and investigation.

• What if I am being threatened or blackmailed?

  If you have shared an intimate image/video and are now being threatened, blackmailed, etc., the situation has likely gone too far. We strongly suggest you immediately do at least one of the following:

  • Report your concern to Cybertip.ca or to police in your area. You can also contact Cybertip.ca for help by calling us toll-free at 1-866-658-9022.
  • Tell your parents or guardians about what is happening so they can immediately help you with the situation.
  • If you can’t talk to your parents or guardians, tell a safe adult (e.g., teacher, counsellor, relative) about what is going on so they can help you address the situation.

• What if an adult has or is sharing my image?

  If your situation involves an adult who has or is sharing your intimate image/video, you should immediately report your situation to local police or Cybertip.ca.

• Where else can I turn for support or more information?

  • Needhelpnow.ca is designed to provide youth (13 to 17 years old) with practical steps to regain control over the situation. This includes information about contacting websites/online services to request a picture/video be removed, dealing with peers who may have seen or are sharing the content, the importance of emotional support, and information on certain criminal offences.
  • You can contact Kids Help Phone (1-800-668-6868), an anonymous and confidential counselling service.
  • You can find a counsellor either at school or by searching online for drop-in services in your community.
  • If you are a Canadian, you can call us toll-free at 1-866-658-9022 if you need help finding the proper support services in your area.
  • Our Resource Guide for Families is available to assist families when responding to self/peer exploitation incidents.

• The Law

  Canada has a law to help deal with the non-consensual distribution of an intimate image. It is illegal for a person to distribute an intimate image of another person without that person’s consent.

  If someone has an intimate image/video of you that was created in private circumstances, and that person knowingly posts it online or shares it with someone else knowing that you would not consent to (or being reckless about whether you would consent to it), the person could be charged. Given the serious nature of criminal charges, police will need to verify that the person in the picture/video is you — you may need to provide any messages you sent or received about the picture/video, or other details about it, such as identifying features.

  Certain provinces have additional legislation in place that would allow you to bring a civil action in court against the person(s) who distributed your intimate image without your consent. See “Additional Legislation in Certain Provinces” below for more information.

• What if I am an adult (18+) who is concerned about another person having and/or sharing my intimate image/video?

  Cybertip.ca deals with online sexual victimization involving individuals under 18 years of age. However, it is important to note that the non-consensual distribution of an intimate image offence also applies to adults. If you are an adult concerned about an intimate image being shared without your consent, learn more about the steps you can take.

  Note: While posting a recording online or sharing it by phone are likely the most common ways this offence will take place, the offence also includes selling the image, advertising the image, or making it available such as posting a link to the image.

The above is general information and it is provided to help you understand the law better. It is not intended to include everything, and you should reference the actual legislation if you need to understand more about the law. It is NOT legal advice—consult a lawyer when needed. This is a recent law and it is not possible to predict how it will be interpreted and enforced by police and the courts.

Additional Legislation in Certain Provinces

The following provinces have their own additional legislation in place to complement the existing criminal law related to the offence of Non-consensual distribution of intimate images . If you are affected by someone having and/or sharing your sexual (intimate ) image, click on your province on the map below for more information. Note that British Columbia, Ontario, Québec, New Brunswick, Prince Edward Island, Yukon, the Northwest Territories, and Nunavut do not currently have any additional legislation in place.